Mardy Roux

The Mardy Roux Obesity Treatment Project – The Rules

In Uncategorized on June 11, 2010 at 1:59 am

I am Mardy Roux. I had been struggling for a decade and half with obesity that was only getting worse as time went by. This is the program I began to construct for myself to cure my obesity. As I write this I am inching ever closer to no longer being an obese person. Today I am happy, well fed, and my skin looks better than it looked when I was in my 30s. So let me start right at the very beginning, with my own personal set of weight loss rules.

The Big Mama One Rule to Rule Them All Rule
Whichever way I’m going to lose weight, if I can’t stay the course for at least a few years, then it’s not going to work. So understanding my own needs and structuring my approach so that I can follow the path for years and years is the number one priority. This doesn’t mean that the pathway I start out on will look anything at all like the pathway I end up on, because I’m moving from phase to phase as I go. All I know is, if I feel like my life will only start to happen after I finish losing the weight, then I will never lose the weight. So I must feel like I’m still living my life, mostly the way I want to live it. And if I feel this way, I will just live happily through the next couple of years and one day I will wake up and realize I am no longer fat.

The Don’t Make Me Think About Food All Day Rule
My days must never feel like they are only all about what I eat. For me, “diet planning fatigue” is a major factor in why I fail at diets. I just become mentally exhausted by having to constantly worry about what food I’m going to eat, weighing or measuring or counting everything. I lead the same kind of stressful lifestyle so many people lead, and I’m just too tired most of the time to be planning what I’m going to eat all the time. If I can’t get up in the morning and “go with the flow” to some extent then I know that sooner rather than later I will become too fatigued to stay the course.

The Give Me That Cup of Coffee or Die Rule
There are two things in my life food-wise that I believe make my life worth living. But one of them is do or die. Coffee. The coffee I drink throughout the day and the glass or two of wine I like to drink in the evening are my two greatest pleasures, and for crying out loud they’re even LEGAL. I haven’t made it almost to 50 years of age to start living like a freaking nun. I can forego wine most of the time if I decide I have to, although I’m not willing to do so permanently, but I simply refuse to stop drinking my coffee, which I enjoy with full cream milk.

The Starving For Months on End Is Not Living Rule
I’ve done just about every diet under the sun, and most of them leave me hungry. Day in, day out. If I feel like I’m hungry all the time, then eventually I’ll crack. And when I crack, I gain back all the weight I’ve lost plus 20%. Nope. Not going there.

The I Am Not My Weight Rule
I have finally realized that by weighing myself I am my own worst enemy. Human weight fluctuates widely and wildy, and as a peri-menopausal woman my weight has been known to jump up by more than 7 pounds overnight. That’s enough to completely destroy my morale and send me running to the store to buy something sugary and comforting. I’ve also realized that I tend to be rather obsessive about my weight once I’m on any kind of plan trying to lose it, and as a result I start to identify myself by the numbers on that damned machine. I am not going to do that anymore. I will not weigh myself until a year after I start my obesity treatment project, and then yearly after that. In the meantime, I will reacquaint myself with my body. I’ll get to know my rolls of fat and my curves and the way my tummy feels when I’m sitting on the sofa with my feet up watching So You Think You Can Dance. I won’t even measure myself. Nope, no measuring! If my clothes are looser, I’ve lost weight. If my knickers fall off while I’m in the supermarket I shall rejoice, for I will have lost so much weight I need new knickers! And if I find myself looking at my naked body in the bathroom mirror as I climb into the shower, and in that moment I am not repulsed by what I see, then I will know something positive has changed. Maybe I am not as fat. Maybe I am learning to accept myself now that I’m getting to know the mirror woman again. Maybe a little of both. Whatever it is, it’s a good thing as Martha would say.

The Hit the Couch and Love It Rule
Now I know that some people will jump all over me because of this. You MUST exercise if you want to lose weight they will scream with a disturbing amount of passion. But let me just say that their passion is borne not from any real scientific proof that exercise helps people lose weight, but from a sense of moral superiority that some thin people have when it comes to fat people. You see, if you are obese, then you must be lazy, and with that awful moral judgement held firmly against us, the skinnies march forth proclaiming we must be cured of our laziness if ever we are to become thin, which means we will once again be considered to be people of good moral character (no matter how much rubbish a thin person eats, or how little they exercise, they clearly are better people than fat people it seems). The medical profession is also culpable in their character assassination of obese people. The message is loud and clear – “Get off your fat lazy butt and you’ll lose weight”. Well you know what? NO!! Exercise does not make me lose weight (I’ll talk about this more in a later post), and what’s more, my body tells me I’m TIRED. Yes, I’m fat, but it makes me tired. Get a skinny person to carry around more than hundred pounds of potatoes for an entire day and then get them to tell you whether carrying around all that extra weight wears them out or not. I love to exercise when I’m not feeling exhausted. But right now I’m fat and I’m exhausted, and I’m going to rest. Screw the doctors. Screw the holier-than-thou thin people. When my energy starts to return, I’ll be the first one enjoying the thrill of moving around. Until then, every chance I get I’m resting, because my body is telling me it feels like it does when I have the flu….it’s tired and it wants me to rest.

Next post…The Mardy Roux Obesity Treatment Project – Phase 1

Mardy Roux

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  1. Mardy, I’m intrigued by your project. I read a post of yours at Huffington Post and followed your link here. I’ve read each post and am thrilled that you’ve found something that works. I’m 52 and about 90 lbs overweight and identify with EVERYTHING you’ve said so far. I look forward to following your progress and learning a thing or two. I have just about given up, but now feel some hope. Thank you!

    • Hi Susan! First of all, welcome to my little blog. The reason I started it was to offer whatever I’ve learned in case it can help anyone else out there who’s been just like me. Stuck. I think one of the biggest problems people like us face is that in this world of the 30 second attention span, most people are looking for a solution that can be captured in a soundbite, and so most solutions are presented that way. Well, my experience is that in real life it’s a little more complex than that. I’m also concerned that for the most part, we are all told to do the same things, regardless of our ages, or our gender, or whether we’re menopausal or suffering from high levels of metabolic resistance. I think that women who are in peri-menopause onwards, who are obese, and who have great difficulty losing weight will be very interested in what I’m discovering. Please don’t lose hope in getting your weight to a place where you’re happy and comfortable in your own skin. I have a bunch more posts almost ready to start going up on dealing with Phase 1 and Set Day Fasts. That first month gave me my life back. My asthma reduced dramatically (six months in and I am now completely off asthma medication), I know I lost some weight, but mostly, I gained back CONTROL over the situation. And armed as I am now with my ability to fast for just one day, I will never have to go back. And one more thing…when I got out of the shower this evening, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror, from the side, with the towel kindly covering my slowly diminishing belly. Well! I was startled because at first glance it looked to me like I’d had a butt-lift! Sure, there’s still plenty of orange-peel there, although much less than there was six months ago, but the profile was almost a pleasing one, and much younger than I’ve looked for years and years! With that belly fat covered I could see what a great change my body has been through so far. And I am now in a later phase where I’m really adding a focus to the belly fat and it seems to be helping. Please stick with it. We can do this. We can get our lives back. Good luck!

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